Canggu's BEST Family Bungalow: NE66A Luxury Escape Awaits!
Okay, buckle up, because reviewing [Hotel Name Redacted, Let's just call it "The Grand Dream"] is going to be a wild ride. Forget those sterile, perfect reviews. I’m going in deep, and honestly, I'm still recovering from the experience.
First Impressions (and the Staircase from Hell!)
The Grand Dream? Well, the name's ambitious. Let's start with the exterior. It’s… there. Kinda imposing, like a slightly weathered cruise ship that somehow ended up inland. The first hurdle? That massive, elegant staircase leading up to the lobby. Okay, elegance is subjective. It’s undeniably a statement, but if you, like me (and apparently, a lot of other guests), are lugging a suitcase or, God forbid, traveling with someone who uses a wheelchair… prepare for a workout. Accessibility: I think there was a ramp around the side, but it wasn't immediately obvious. Not a fantastic first impression for the wheelchair-bound, or those pushing strollers. I mean, shouldn't a grand hotel get this right?
Rambling through Rooms and Revelations
Rooms: My room… was a mixed bag. Available in all rooms: Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens…. That's a lot of stuff, and it’s true, they pretty much had everything. And I mean everything. The bathroom? Decent. The bathtub? Big enough to drown my sorrows in (and surprisingly, there’s a bathroom phone! Who uses one of those anymore?). The mini-bar was stocked (and overpriced, let's be honest), and the blackout curtains? Lifesavers! The "extra long bed" was… well, it was long. But the vibe was a little sterile. Like a well-appointed hospital room. Not a disaster, but not exactly "romantic getaway" material.
Internet: Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! Yesss! And it actually worked, which is a miracle. Internet access – LAN? Never even used it, but it was there! Important to note, the Wi-Fi in the public areas was great – a lifesaver to get a quick work done.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: A Symphony of Contradictions
Food and drink is a massive category with so many options! OK, let’s dive in the food situation. The Grand Dream had options. Too many, maybe? Restaurants? Plural. Bars? Yes. Coffee shops? You betcha. Poolside bar? Ding, ding, ding!
Breakfast [buffet] Oh, the breakfast buffet. It was an experience. Asian breakfast, Western breakfast. Buffet in restaurant. Coffee/tea in restaurant. A glorious, chaotic, carb-loaded free-for-all. Breakfast takeaway service was available, which was nice for an early start. The eggs were… well, they were eggs. The pastries? Probably a bit stale. The international buffet? A bit too "international," if you know what I mean. Everything tasted fine but nothing really stood out.
Poolside bar: The pool itself was lovely, Pool with a view, Swimming pool [outdoor], even if there was another staircase getting there. And the poolside bar? Poolside bar, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Juice, Soft drink, and snacks. They had a great Happy Hour, which helped forget the price of things. And in case you’re feeling ravenous or just lazy, [24-hour] Room service is available, and they have alternative meal arrangements for you.
The Restaurants: A la carte in restaurant, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Desserts in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, Salad in restaurant, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western cuisine in restaurant. I tried the "fancy" restaurant one night. The food was… fine. The ambience, however, was trying way too hard to be chic. And the prices? Let's just say I'm eating instant noodles for a week to recover.
And then there’s the Snack Bar: Snack bar, Bottle of water. I am still unsure whether it was really a snack bar or not, or just whatever was left from the buffet.
So, to summarize the food: Lots of variety, sometimes good, sometimes over priced.
Relaxing (or Trying To)
Ways to relax: Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool. Ah, the spa. Now we're talking. Or are we? The Grand Dream has a full-service spa. Spa, Steamroom, Massage, Sauna. I went for a massage. It was… okay. Nothing to write home about. The facilities were nice, though. A sauna, a steam room, all the usual suspects. The Fitness center? Standard gym fare. Treadmills, weights, the usual. It wasn't exactly state-of-the-art but got the job done.
Cleanliness, Safety, and Everything Else
Cleanliness and safety, Anti-viral cleaning products, Cashless payment service, Daily disinfection in common areas, Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit, Hand sanitizer, Hot water linen and laundry washing, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Shared stationery removed, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment, Access, CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property, Exterior corridor, Fire extinguisher, Front desk [24-hour], Hotel chain, Non-smoking rooms, Room decorations, Safety/security feature, Security [24-hour], Smoke alarms, Soundproof rooms. Okay, kudos to The Grand Dream on this front. They take safety seriously. I saw them cleaning everything constantly. Anti-viral cleaning products, daily disinfection…. They had hand sanitizer everywhere, and the staff was masked and very polite. Safety/security features are a prominent feature!
Services and Conveniences & "For the Kids"
Services and conveniences were good: Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center. The concierge was helpful. The doorman was… well, he was there. Dry cleaning was available. So was the elevator! The convenience store was over priced as you can suspect.
For The Kids: Ah, “family-friendly”. Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal. I didn't have kids with me, but there were definitely some. There was a kids' pool, and they seemed to be having a ball.
Getting Around:
Getting around, Airport transfer, Bicycle parking, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking. The location is a bit outside of the city center, so you'll need to use a taxi or the hotel’s airport transfer. The on-site parking was great, and they even had car power charging stations.
Access and Accessibility: The Grand Dream's Achilles Heel
Okay, let’s revisit that accessibility issue. I’m going to be brutally honest. Facilities for disabled guests: It says they have them, but the physical layout of the hotel – the stairs, the awkward ramps (where they exist) – doesn't exactly scream "accessible." The elevators were adequate, but getting to them… well, it took some navigating. I'd cautiously recommend it if you require accessible features, but CALL AHEAD and verify details. I really hope The Grand Dream addresses this. It's 2024, and accessibility shouldn't be an afterthought.
The Verdict
The Grand Dream is… a mixed bag. It’s trying to be grand, and in some respects, it succeeds. The amenities are impressive, the location is decent, and the staff is generally friendly. But there are flaws.
Indonesian Paradise: Your Private Pool Villa Awaits (V446)
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your average polished travel itinerary. This is a Canggu Family Bungalow Adventure, and trust me, we're going to need a stiff drink (or five) by the end of it.
Destination: Luxury Family Bungalow NE66A, Canggu, Bali, Indonesia - Home Base
People in Transit: Me (the frazzled planner, aka the designated worry-wart), Husband (the "I'll pack light" King, also blissfully unaware), Two Kids (aged 7 and 10, meaning chaos is a given, sprinkled with tiny, fleeting moments of adorableness).
Day 1: The Great Arrival (and the ensuing meltdown of luggage-related proportions)
- 8:00 AM (Bali Time, which is basically "Whenever We Feel Like It" Time): "Wake up" (or, more accurately, get shoved awake by a small human demanding a fruit smoothie. Actually, scratch that, let's be real, it was more a "wake-up-screaming" situation). The jet lag is already kicking in, my brain feels like scrambled eggs, and the house looks like a bomb went off. Which it basically did.
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast Disaster: Pancakes. Burnt pancakes. Crying children. Husband wandering around saying, "Wow, this place is beautiful!" while I consider launching the damn pancake spatula at his face. Note to self: hire a chef. Immediately.
- 10:00 AM - 1:00 PM: The Luggage Labyrinth: Okay, so remember that "I'll pack light" King? Yeah, he packed one tiny backpack. Leaving all the beach clothes, sunscreens, and (crucially) the special water shoes for the kids IN THE MAIN LUGGAGE. Which, naturally, is "delayed." Cue the silent scream. My inner voice is screaming "WHY DID I NOT PACK FOR THE BEACH!!!"
- 2:00 PM: Poolside Debacle: The bungalow's pool is gorgeous, but the kids immediately decided it's a platform for daring cliff dives and synchronized splashing events. My attempt at a relaxing poolside read is quickly abandoned in favour of the constant shouts of "Mom, watch me!" I can feel the sunscreen slowly dripping off my face from the heat.
- 4:00 PM: First Balinese Lunch at Warung Bu Mi: Great food, and the kids have finally calmed down! Great local prices as well.
- 6:00 PM: First Big Lesson… We arrive at the beach and are horrified! The beach is full of garbage! I was not ready for this sight. I now know what the word "disheartening" means.
- 7:00 PM: That first sundowner… We had drinks at the bungalow, and it was actually peaceful! The kids passed out already.
- 8:00 PM: Lights out… I went in the Bungalow and saw giant cockroaches. And went out to sleep in the veranda, with all kinds of mosquitos and some geckos.
Day 2: Cultural Awakening (or, the day I almost lost my mind at a temple)
- 8:00 AM: More pancake-related trauma. This time, the kids are arguing over the last banana. I'm starting to suspect they're secretly plotting my demise.
- 9:00 AM: The Temple Tempest: Today, we were supposed to go to the Tanalot Temple. I was not ready for the crowds! There were a million people! The kids immediately started fussing, the husband got distracted by an overly enthusiastic vendor, and I swear I felt my blood pressure rise with every selfie stick shoved in my face. I gave up, and took us back home. We did not see the temple!
- 11:00 AM: The Rescue Mission: We did some shopping today! We also bought the kids some boogie boards!
- 1:00 PM: Lunchtime with a View: We found a little local warung that had amazing views. It's places like this that make all the chaos worth it.
- 2:00 PM: Beach Boogie-boarding: The kids were so happy with their new boogie boards! But I was so not prepared for how powerful the waves can be!
- 5:00 PM: Sunset Serenity (Attempted): Back to the beach for sunset. This time, I armed myself with snacks, bribes (chocolate!), and a hefty dose of zen. The sunset was gorgeous. Briefly. Until the kids started a sandcastle war. I swear I almost got hit by a rogue bucket.
- 7:00 PM: Dinner Drama (again…): We ordered in from a local restaurant. The spicy food was too spicy. Cue more tears and protests (mostly from the kids).
- 9:00 PM: Bed Time: Everyone sleeps! (Except the mosquitos).
Day 3: The Day of "Actually Enjoying Things" (Miracle!)
- Free Day: With our limited luggage, we need to do shopping. This will keep the adults busy and the children happy.
- Afternoon… The plan is to do some surfing lessons. Let's cross fingers that this doesn't result in another family meltdown.
- Evening… Dinner at home, with the chef! I'm hoping for a relaxing evening but I'm expecting for a whole lotta chaos.
Day 4-7: The Unpredictable Aftermath (aka, The "We'll See" Days)
- This is where it gets hazy… Honestly, who knows what will happen in the next few days? Maybe more temple debacles. Maybe a beach day where everyone actually enjoys it. Maybe a complete and utter holiday disaster. The beauty (or the horror) of family travel is its unpredictability.
- I'll try to keep you posted… But honestly, right now, I'm just hoping I can get through the next hour without losing my mind. Keep the wine flowing, send positive vibes, and wish us luck. We’re gonna need it.
Final Thoughts (Or, the Bit Where I Pretend to Have Learned Something)
Look, this trip isn't perfect. It's messy. It's loud. It's full of meltdowns and moments of pure, unadulterated exhaustion. But it's also filled with those tiny, unexpected moments of joy – the kids laughing, the sunset that did manage to sneak through, the (occasionally) delicious food. And that, I guess, is what it’s all about. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go barricade myself in the bathroom with a bottle of something strong and plan my escape route. Bali is beautiful, but a vacation from my family may be necessary soon. Wish me luck!
Escape to Paradise: Sunmoonstarvillas Indonesia Awaits!
Okay, first question... Why are you even *doing* this?
Ugh, good question. Honestly? Partly because I was bored. Partly because I'm a masochist and enjoy putting myself through this. And then there's this deep-seated need to feel like I *know* things, even if I absolutely don't. So, here we are. I'm probably going to regret this. Probably. Maybe. It depends on how many people actually *read* this thing. If it’s like, three people and a bot, I might be okay. Five or more and… well, let's just say I'm prepared to develop a crippling social anxiety.
What exactly is this *about*?
Okay, that's fair. I'm making it all, let's just say, more real. Like, the *point* is... well, to explore a certain "thing." But more importantly, it's probably about me. My anxieties. My triumphs (ha!). My questionable life choices. So yeah, this FAQ is just… everything. A messy tapestry of... yeah, you get the idea.
So, what kind of experience are we looking at?
Um… depends on your definition of "experience." I'm aiming for more… raw. Like, I want you to *feel* something. Maybe laughter. Maybe a deep, soul-crushing sense of "me too." Maybe you’ll just be utterly bewildered. Honestly, I’d settle for all of the above. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's just go with "slightly unhinged, heavily caffeinated, and probably regretful."
Think of it this way: you're peering into my brain, watching the gears grind, the cogs clunk, and the occasional spark fly. It's not pretty, but it's... well, it's *mine*.
Is this going to be useful? Like, actually helpful?
Hah! Helpful? Me? That's a good one. Look, if you're looking for clear, concise answers, go download a textbook. If you're looking for a sympathetic ear, maybe call your mom. This? This is more of a… cautionary tale. A guide to what *not* to do. A showcase of spectacularly bad decisions. So, probably not. But hey, you might get a laugh out of it. And isn't that worth something?
What are your credentials? Why should I listen to YOU?
Credentials? Oh, honey, I got *zero* credentials. You can call me "The Queen of Questionable Choices." My only qualification is… well, let’s just say I’ve made enough mistakes to fill a small library of self-help books. I'm basically a walking, talking case study in how *not* to live your life. And maybe, just maybe, that makes me an expert. I'm kidding (kind of).
But here's the truth, listen or don't. It's your life. I'm just here sharing mine. It's my story, and I'm kind of stuck with it.
Okay, here's a curveball: What's your *biggest* regret?
Oh, man. *One*? You want me to pick *one* regret? That's… brutal. Okay, deep breath. Let's not go for the obvious, like that time I dyed my hair green (it was a *disaster*). Or the time I tried to, um, "borrow" my roommate's car. (Don't ask.)
No, if I *had* to pick just one? It’s probably that time I let fear dictate a major life decision. I won’t go into the details (not today, Satan!), but let's just say it involved missed opportunities, a lot of “what ifs,” and more than a few sleepless nights. It haunts me still. The 'what ifs' are the worst, you know? Like those little shadows that whisper in your ear at 3 AM when you're trying to sleep. Ugh. But at least I got a good story out of it, right? (I'm just trying to make myself feel better, okay?)
Do you ever get scared, and if so, what's that like?
Scared? Oh, honey, I'm practically fueled by fear. The heart-pounding, palms-sweating, existential-dread kind of scared. I get scared of the dark, and heights, and that weird sound the fridge makes at 3 AM. But really, I get terrified. Terrified that I'm not good enough. Terrified that I'll mess things up. Terrified of being alone. Terrified of… well, you get the idea.
It's a whirlwind, you know? Your mind starts racing, conjuring up every possible worst-case scenario. You feel physically ill like you're on the verge of throwing up. And then the self-doubt kicks in. The inner critic starts shouting. It's exhausting. And then, if you're lucky (and sometimes, I'm not), you find a way to breathe through it. To remind yourself that you are, in fact, still here. And then, you just have to keep going. Ugh, it's a lot. A whole. Damn. Lot.
So, how do you *cope* with all this… stuff?
Cope? That's a laugh! Just kidding. Okay, honestly? It's a work in progress. I'm a work in progress. Some days, I'm a master of Zen; other days, I'm curled up in a ball of despair, watching cat videos and eating ice cream straight from the carton. I'm constantly trying new things. I try to exercise, journal, meditate. I’m really trying. I love listening to podcasts and sometimes that helps. Sometimes, I'm just like "Wow! Ok, maybe I can keep going." It’s just all one big experiment of “does anything stick?”
But the biggest thing? I'm (slowly, painfully, and with a lot of setbacks) learning to be kind to myself. To accept that I'm flawed. That I make mistakes. And that's… probably the most important thing.
