Escape to Paradise: Unforgettable Stays at Trees Too Guest Lodge, South Africa
Okay, buckle up, buttercups. Because I'm about to launch you headfirst into a review so raw, so unfiltered, so me, it'll make you feel like you’ve actually been to Trees Too Guest Lodge in South Africa. Forget boring, clinical reviews. I'm going full-on sensory overload. Get ready to feel it.
Escape to Paradise: Unforgettable Stays at Trees Too Guest Lodge – OR, How a Soul-Crushing Week Turned into a Glorious Jungle Tango
Let's be honest, I landed at Trees Too after a week that felt like a personal apocalypse. I was so stressed, I swear my hair follicles were actively trying to escape my scalp. I needed a vacation, not some sterile hotel experience. Thank god, Trees Too knew what I needed – serious, serious pampering, a touch of the wild, and a hefty dose of “get your ass on the porch and stare at a goddamn mountain.”
First off, Accessibility. Now, I didn't need it, physically, but I always respect a place that gets accessibility. Seeing the "Facilities for disabled guests" listed wasn't just a tick-box, it was a silent promise. They've got an elevator, which, believe me, after my week, felt like a godsend.
Arriving. And Suddenly, Existing.
I stumbled out of the airport transfer (yes, they have Airport transfer, thankfully. I was a wreck), and the sheer air hit me. The air! It smelled…alive. Different. And bam, I was hit with that gorgeous South African sun. The Exterior corridor was a delight! You feel like you're already part of this lush jungle, a precursor of the bliss to come.
The Room – My Sanctuary (And My Temporary Mess)
Alright, let’s get down to brass tacks. My room? Pure, friggin’ heaven. The Air conditioning was a lifesaver. And the Blackout curtains? Oh, sweet Jesus, you can sleep like a damned baby in those. I love a good sleep so, the Extra long bed was a huge plus! I’m a bit of a snorer, so the Soundproof rooms were a lifesaver for my travel buddy. The Free Wi-Fi was a godsend (yes, a godsend), and they have Internet access – wireless and Internet access – LAN, though honestly, I mostly just wanted to be off the grid. I took advantage of the Coffee/tea maker and had some complimentary tea, and then put myself in the bathrobe and made myself cozy.
The Bathroom – My Private Spa Ritual.
The Private bathroom was perfect. The Separate shower/bathtub was a luxury. The Bathrobes were super soft. The Toiletries are provided. I mean, I took a bath every night, and it was glorious. The Hot water and the Hair dryer were a must for me.
Cleanliness and Safety – Because Even Paradise Needs a Little Order
Okay, look. I’m a bit of a germaphobe, I admit it. The fact that they're all over Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, and Rooms sanitized between stays… this made me breathe a huge sigh of relief. They've got Hand sanitizer everywhere! They have Staff trained in safety protocol, and it’s a good feeling, especially after the week I had. And the Doctor/nurse on call made me feel safe!
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking – My Stomach’s Adventure
Okay, food is important, alright? I am a foodie. They have Restaurants aplenty. I went all in.
- The First Meal: A Buffet in restaurant was a godsend! It's South Africa, so of course there’s some Asian cuisine in restaurant and International cuisine in restaurant, but there was also a massive Salad in restaurant that saved me from myself on more than one occasion. The Coffee shop was a godsend – great coffee, great view.
- The Poolside Bar: I spent a few hours here. The Poolside bar was my happy place. I might have had a few too many cocktails, but who’s judging? (Nobody. I'm judging nobody.)
- The A la carte in restaurants was a delight. The menu had a fantastic presentation of Western cuisine in restaurant.
- Breakfast: The Breakfast in room option was tempting, especially when I was feeling fragile. But I was also blown away by the Breakfast [buffet], where I had a taste of everything from their Asian breakfast! They do have the Breakfast takeaway service!
Spa & Relaxation – My Body’s Redemption
THIS, my friends, THIS is where Trees Too truly shines. Remember that soul-crushing week? It was obliterated by the spa.
- Massage: I got a massage. A really, really good massage. I think I may have drooled. I don't care. It was pure bliss.
- Sauna and Steam room: I sweated out all the toxins of the previous week. I felt like a new, slightly less stressed person.
- The Pool with view: The thing is, you're not just looking at water; you’re looking at a view. The Swimming pool [outdoor] and the Pool with view were amazing.
Things to Do – Beyond the Bliss
Okay, I managed to drag myself away from the pool and the spa, eventually. Though, honestly, I could’ve stayed there forever.
- Fitness center: Okay, I’ll admit it, I glanced at the Fitness center. Maybe I went in. Maybe I just looked at the equipment. I don't want to talk about it.
- Things to do: So much. I was there to relax, to be honest!
Services and Conveniences – Because Life is Easier When Someone Else Handles the Details
- Concierge: They helped me with everything. Literally everything. And the fact that they have Cash withdrawal, Luggage storage, Laundry service, and Dry cleaning… so helpful.
- Getting Around They have Airport transfer, Car park [free of charge], and Taxi service.
- For the kids: I didn't need it, but the fact that Trees Too offers Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, and Kids meal shows they're on top of everything!
The Imperfect Bits (Because Perfection is Boring)
No place is perfect, and that's part of the charm. The Wi-Fi was occasionally a little patchy. Maybe the coffee selection could be slightly more extensive. Fine. I'm nitpicking.
Why You NEED to Book Trees Too… Right Now.
Look, I’ve traveled. I’ve seen a lot. And I’m telling you, Trees Too Guest Lodge is special. It’s not just a hotel. It’s an experience. It’s a sanctuary. It's not just a place to stay; it's a place to be. They have Check-in/out [express], and even Check-in/out [private]. It’s a place filled with Non-smoking rooms and Smoking area. If you need to escape the ordinary, the grind, the soul-crushing week… book it. RIGHT NOW.
Here's the Deal: The Escape to Paradise Offer
For a limited time only, we’re offering a special package designed to completely revitalize your tired soul.
The "Total Rejuvenation Package" includes:
- 3 Nights’ Accommodation with a guaranteed room upgrade (subject to availability).
- Daily Breakfast Buffet featuring a selection of fresh, local delicacies.
- One 60-minute Full Body Massage at that incredible spa.
- After-dinner drinks - Daily happy hour at the bar.
- A Complimentary bottle of water and other complimentary goodies!
- 24-hour room service to cater to your needs.
- 10% Discount on all other spa treatments throughout your stay.
But that’s not all!
Book directly through our website and use the code "JungleBliss" to receive a complimentary welcome drink upon arrival and a late check-out (subject to availability), to extend your bliss!
Don't let another week pass you by. Escape to Trees Too Guest Lodge. Escape to Paradise.
Quebec City Airport Hotel: Unbeatable Deals & Luxury You Won't Believe!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because here's my hilariously imperfect attempt at a Trees Too Guest Lodge itinerary. Forget perfect schedules and predictable prose – this is a travel log as lived, as felt, and with all the glorious chaos of a real human being trying to navigate the bush.
Trees Too Guest Lodge: Operation "Don't Get Eaten by a Lion (Probably)"
(Disclaimer: I am terrible at planning. This is more of a suggestion, a rough guideline… a prayer, really. Adapt, improvise, survive. Let’s go!)
Day 1: Arrival & Impatience in Paradise (Or, "Waiting for the Drinks Cart")
- Morning: Arrive at Trees Too. "Wow," I thought. "Trees, indeed." (Duh.) The drive from the airport was… well, let's just say the car was a little too "adventure-ready" for my city-slicker sensibilities. The road felt like a particularly ambitious roller coaster. First impression: the air smells like… something. Green and earth and a hint of potential lion breath?
- Midday: Check-in! They handed me a welcome drink which I chugged down faster than you can say "bushveld." Got to the room and immediately flopped on the bed, thinking, “This is the life.” Then: a frantic search for the Wi-Fi password. Apparently, the wilderness is not entirely devoid of modern anxieties.
- Afternoon: Game drive! (This is where things went from pleasant to possibly terrifying.) Our guide, a lovely woman named Sarah, kept pointing at things I couldn't see. "A leopard! See the tail?" Nope. "A baboon grooming his friend!" Nope, just a rock that looked vaguely like a baboon. My eyes weren't equipped for this level of wildlife spotting. But the sunset? Oh, the sunset. Glorious, fiery, and completely worth the mosquito bites.
- Evening: Dinner! (Hallelujah.) The food was amazing. One of those nights where I was definitely going back for seconds (and thirds, and maybe a sneaky fourth). Then, a few drinks around the fire pit… and a slightly tipsy realization that the South African stars are way, way brighter than I remember. Fell asleep dreaming of giraffes and giant spiders hopefully not crawling on me.
Day 2: Close Encounters of the Furry Kind (and the "Almost Ran Over a Warthog" Incident)
- Morning: The sunrise woke me up. This is supposed to be the best part of the day, and it's really hard to disagree with the experience. We did another game drive - Sarah was still pointing at things I couldn't see, though I did get a fleeting glimpse of a warthog, which was close enough to consider a success.
- Mid-Morning: This is where things got interesting. I accidentally almost ran over a warthog. I was so startled by the fact that the warthog was in the road that I almost crashed. It was a terrifying experience. The warthog was unfazed, and the guide laughed. So much for my "cool explorer" persona.
- Afternoon: Poolside relaxation. The pool felt like an oasis. Spent a good hour just floating, listening to the birdcalls, and trying to forget about my warthog near-miss. (Okay, okay, I was also secretly Googling "How to Survive a Lion Attack" on my phone in case things got real).
- Evening: Night drive! Different again. We saw… well, more things I couldn't quite make out. But the darkness and the anticipation were thrilling. The guide shone a spotlight that revealed a bunch of eyes reflecting back into the darkness. It was both beautiful and slightly unnerving.
- Late Night: Back at the lodge, I found myself in an unexpectedly profound conversation with a fellow traveler about the meaning of life, the universe, and the best way to make a gin and tonic. Somewhere around the second bottle of wine, the meaning of life was definitely decided.
Day 3: Cultural Immersion & the Price of Souvenirs (And Saying Goodbye to Paradise)
Morning: Visit to a local village or community. This was a genuinely moving experience. The people we met were so welcoming, so full of life and laughter. Learned about their traditions. Bought some souvenirs.
Midday: Lunch at the lodge with a view. I'm pretty sure I'll miss the food the most. The chefs were wizards in the kitchen.
Afternoon: My inner child decided to do some more hiking to explore the lodge and its surroundings, and the hiking led me to an amazing place. I sat there for a while, and I just enjoyed the views. That's when I realized that I won't want to go.
Evening: Dinner and drinks. A last toast to the amazing time I had. Packed my bag.
Late Night: Reflecting on the adventure, I realized that I had learned so much from the experience. It was a trip that will always be a part of me.
Day 4: Departure & the Longing for the Bush
Morning: Heartbreaking goodbye. The lodge staff was amazing. I probably left a piece of my heart (and maybe a sock) behind. Drove back to the airport, already planning my return. The city felt duller, the air less alive. I might have stared longingly at every passing tree, wondering if it held a hidden leopard.
(The rest of the day) Post-trip blues. Started missing the bush at around 3 pm. Cried a little. Made a mental list of all the things I need to do to get back to Trees Too ASAP, and wrote more about my experience.
Food Notes:
- Biltong: Eat it all. Seriously.
- Amarula: A life-changing experience. Don't look back.
- Anything grilled: You're in South Africa. Embrace the braai.
Quirks and Cranky Observations:
- The amount of stuff I needed for this trip was insane, I thought.
- I felt like a complete idiot when I couldn't spot the wildlife.
- The sudden appearances of lizards and insects everywhere were a bit of a jump scare.
- The lack of phone signal was both freeing and terrifying.
Final Thoughts:
This trip to Trees Too was a beautiful, imperfect, messy, and utterly unforgettable experience. It challenged me, it thrilled me, it filled me with a strange mix of awe and mild panic. I'm already saving up to go back! Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to dream of the African bush… and maybe work on my wildlife spotting skills. Wish me luck! And remember, pack extra socks. You never know.
BCN DREAM: 2-Bedroom Oasis in the Heart of Barcelona!
Escape to Paradise: Trees Too Guest Lodge - The Honest FAQ You Actually Need
Okay, so "Paradise"... is that just marketing fluff, or is Trees Too *actually* amazing?
Alright, let's be real. "Paradise" is a BIG word. Is Trees Too perfect? Absolutely not. Did I have moments where I wanted to chuck my phone into the (gorgeous, by the way) pool? Maybe. But the feeling... the *vibe*... it's pretty damn close. I mean, waking up to the sound of birds and monkeys (who occasionally steal your breakfast – true story, more on that later) IS a good start. It's more 'rustic chic' than pristine resort, and that's the charm. It's REAL. You're not just *seeing* nature; you're *in* it.
What's the food like? Do I need to pack emergency granola bars?
The food... *deep sigh of contentment*. Okay, so I’m a total foodie. The breakfast? Glorious. Fresh fruit, AMAZING coffee (a must-have to combat the jet lag!), and the eggs? Perfectly cooked. They even offer a full English, which I obviously indulged in – Hey, I was on holiday! Dinners were a bit more of a gamble. Sometimes it was a home run (the curry was phenomenal, honestly I still dream of it!), and sometimes… well, let's say the pasta dish that one night felt a bit… *left to its own devices*. But honestly? It’s the imperfection that makes it feel authentic. Plus, even the less-than-stellar dishes were eaten alfresco with a glass of wine and a view that rivals the Louvre. So, emergency granola? Maybe pack a couple, just in case you're a super-picky eater, but honestly? Embrace the adventure! (and the monkeys, who, again, *will* steal your food if you're not careful.)
The rooms – are they comfortable or just Instagram-worthy?
Okay, the rooms... They are beautiful. Seriously beautiful. Think HUGE beds with mosquito nets (essential!), gorgeous views, and a sense of being cocooned in your own little jungle retreat. And yes, they *are* Instagram-worthy. But the comfort? That's what really got me! Forget those tiny hotel rooms where you can barely swing a cat (or a monkey, for that matter). These rooms are spacious, airy, and designed for relaxation. I spent one afternoon just lying on my bed, reading a book, and listening to the sounds of the forest. Pure bliss. My only tiny, TINY complaint? The WiFi could be spotty at times. But honestly? It's a good excuse to disconnect and, you know, *actually* relax. Which, by the way, is what I was there for.
Seriously, those monkeys... what's the REAL deal? Should I be terrified?
Okay, the monkeys. Let’s break this down. Terrified? No. Slightly exasperated? ABSOLUTELY. They're mischievous little buggers. They're clever, they’re fast and they’re on the hunt for food. I had a croissant *snatched* right from my plate one morning! It happened so fast, I didn’t even see it coming. It was a blur of furry limbs and a triumphant monkey grin. The staff warned me – "Don't leave food unattended!" – and I thought I was being careful. I was wrong. They're cute, though. And let's be honest, it adds to the experience. Just… be aware! Keep your doors and windows closed, don't leave snacks lying around, and embrace their cheeky antics. And maybe, just maybe, bring an extra croissant for yourself.
What activities are there? I don't want to just sit and stare at trees (though… that's tempting).
Okay, so you *can* just sit and stare at trees, and frankly, I highly recommend it. Sometimes, that's all I did. But there's plenty more. There are hiking trails (that'll work off those breakfast muffins!), bird watching (bring binoculars!), and stunning beaches nearby. They can arrange various tours for you too, including a safari (a MUST-DO – I saw a lion! A real, live lion!). I opted for a guided walk one day. Our guide? This amazing guy who knew EVERYTHING about the local flora and fauna. I felt like I was in a proper nature documentary! The highlight? Seeing a chameleon. Seriously, the colors! It was magical. Just be aware that not all tours are created equal. Do your research. The lodge staff are super helpful about recommending the best ones, which is great.
Is it good for families? Or more of a romantic getaway?
It’s flexible. I saw a mix of couples, groups of friends, and families with older kids. Young kids maybe not so much (those monkeys!). Honestly? It’s what *you* make of it. If you want a romantic getaway, the secluded rooms, the stunning views, and the shared time over dinner are perfect. If you have older kids who are into nature and adventure, they'll LOVE it. It's not a 'kiddie club' kind of place, but it's a place where you can reconnect with each other, and with nature.
Is the service good? Or are they operating on "island time"?
The service is... generally very good. A few hiccups here and there (hey, we’re human!) but overall, the staff are friendly, helpful, and genuinely want you to have a great time. There was THAT one time, when I ordered a drink that never arrived, and I definitely needed to find someone to remind them. But it was all sorted with a smile. More importantly, they go the extra mile on things. Like one morning, my rental car got stuck at the bottom of a particularly muddy track (don't ask!), and a couple of the staff members came to the rescue! They were patient, friendly, and didn’t laugh too much (at least not to my face!). It felt like a proper community. So, yes, "island time" does apply to some degree, but not in a frustrating way. It's more about relaxing and going with the flow.
Would you go back? The ultimate question.
Absolutely. Without a doubt. I’m already planning my return. The imperfections? They become part of the charm. The mischievous monkeys? I’ll be better prepared next time (more croissants!). The food, the views, the feeling of being truly away from it all… it’s addictive. It’s a place where you can disconnect, reconnect, and just… be. If you're looking for a perfectly polished, sterile experience, this might not be for you. But if you're looking for an adventure, a bit of magic, and a taste of paradise… book it. Seriously,Hotel Finder Reviews
